➡ The Paranoid American podcast, which also publishes comics, has launched a new comic about Stanley Kubrick directing the moon landings. The comic is available on Kickstarter, with various rewards for backers, including digital and print versions, variant covers, and exclusive merchandise. The podcast explores mysteries and secrets of our world, challenging accepted perceptions of reality. It also features guests like Sam Newsman, a trusted puppet in media reporting.
➡ The text is a conversation between a radio show host and a puppet named Sam Newsman. They discuss the puppet’s experiences, including how it feels to be called a puppet, the difference between puppets and marionettes, and the puppet’s perspective on pain. They also touch on the puppet’s views on certain terms and metaphors used in daily life, and the puppet’s experiences in the puppet world, which includes dealing with puppeteers and their hands.
➡ The text discusses the world of puppetry, including the role of puppet handlers and the concept of puppet secret societies. It also explores the philosophical question of identity, using the Ship of Theseus as an example. The text further delves into the importance of imagination in puppetry and ends with a nostalgic reflection on the influence of Saturday morning cartoons.
➡ The speaker reminisces about their childhood experiences with the game “Guess Who” and how they were misled by the commercials into believing the game pieces could talk. They discuss how this could be seen as a form of programming or fostering imagination. The conversation then shifts to the impact of marketing on children’s preferences, comparing it to today’s digital world. The speaker concludes by expressing their preference for the tangible, analog experiences of their childhood over the digital experiences of today’s youth.
➡ The speaker discusses the blending of traditional and AI-generated art, suggesting that understanding the “real” way to create art can enhance AI creations. They also discuss the concept of puppetry, including the distinction between puppets and Muppets, and the potential for AI to mimic puppet movements. The speaker then delves into a critique of Disney movies, particularly Mary Poppins, suggesting that the character gaslights children by introducing them to fantastical elements and then denying their existence. The speaker also touches on the symbolism and cultural significance of chimney sweeps in British folklore.
➡ The text discusses the influence of media on children, focusing on the Disney movie Mary Poppins and its potential hidden messages. It also talks about the changes in children’s television and advertising, such as the removal of toys from cereal boxes and smoking from cartoons. The text suggests these changes may have impacted children’s imagination and understanding of reality. Lastly, it touches on the fear some people have of puppets and ends with a story about a supposed UFO sighting in Roswell.
➡ The text is a conversation between a radio host and a guest. The guest, who used to work in media, discusses his past experiences with spreading misinformation about UFOs and alien technology. He denies any military involvement and insists there were no “little green or gray men.” The conversation also touches on the changing landscape of news consumption, with social media platforms like Twitter and TikTok becoming popular sources. The host, a puppet, talks about his radio show’s success and how it competes with mainstream media, urging listeners to vote for his show in an upcoming award event.
➡ The text is a conversation between two people discussing various topics. They talk about how one of them would report a news event, their daily news reels on social media, and their views on voting. They also discuss their personal needs, preferences for alcohol, and their stance on drug use. The conversation ends with a rapid-fire question round about various conspiracy theories and supernatural beliefs.
➡ The text is a conversation about various conspiracy theories, the concept of an ‘expert’, and the process of summoning demons. The speaker questions the validity of experts, suggesting they are just variables under pressure. They also discuss the idea of ‘false flags’ or staged events, rating several historical events as likely being inside jobs. The conversation ends with a humorous obituary for Joe Biden.
➡ The text is about a radio show host, Sam Newsman, who is passionate about bringing back the magic of Saturday mornings. He encourages listeners to support his show by texting a specific number, and also promotes his social media and radio show times. He also advertises a comic about Stanley Kubrick and the Apollo space missions, and sells propaganda packs and sticker sheets through a website called paranoidamerican.com. The text ends with a rap song about the struggles of life and the music industry.

Hey, thank you for watching listening to another episode of whatever you’re listening to. Paranoid American podcast, the cult Disney paranoid programming, sound Science. There’s a bunch of them, but whatever it is, I appreciate that you’re listening, watching this right now. And if you really want to support Paranoid American, if you didn’t know this, in addition to being a podcast, we’ve actually been publishing comics since 2012. So over a decade, while I was still at Disney, has started this company to publish a little book called Time Samplers. And it’s exploded into 60 different titles at this point, and the biggest one just launched, at least at the time of recording this, but it’s at nasacomic.com stands for never a straight answer, and it’s about Stanley Kubrick directing the moon landings.

I just want to show you some of the cool kind of exclusive things you can get by backing this thing early. So if you go to nasacomic.com, it’ll automatically bring you to this Kickstarter page. And you can see, bam. Hit our goal at the time of recording this 100%. So it’s definitely going to be made. You’ll absolutely get a copy of this thing if you back it. If you’re listening to this in the future and this page isn’t here or brought you somewhere else, then likely you can just buy it right now. So you have to skip all this and just buy the damn thing.

But here’s a couple little previews of artwork. Here’s different variant covers that are for offered. This top left one, I actually have imprint. I got a couple of prototypes printed up just to make sure that it would look good. It looks great. Looks amazing. Full color gloss pages. It’s got a nice hefty weight to it because it’s 40 different pages of all unique art that you haven’t seen before. There’s also going to be a variant cover. There’s going to be a foil, hollow foil cover, and then there’s a little postcard print that anybody that gets a physical copy of the comic in any form, they’re going to end up getting this postcard size print here.

Here’s some different artwork samples from the three different artists that contributed to this book. And then here’s the important part, the rewards. So by backing this project, you’re going to get to pick some different kind of reward tier. The entry level one is this digital deluxe, which has the entire book in digital form. You’ll get a PDF. It’s also going to have an additional eight different pages that aren’t in any of the print versions just because they were. Maybe some were a little too spicy, maybe some were a slightly different art style. But I’m going to give all that in the digital deluxe along with some wallpapers and some mp3 s and stuff.

If you want the print one that I was just holding up here, then the entry for that one is $15. With that, you’re going to get that little postcard print I mentioned. You’re going to get a trading card, you’re going to get a bookmark, and you’ll probably get some other stuff. Because I always throw in extra freebies. You ask anyone that’s bought anything from paranoid american, I hook it up with lots of extras. If you want the variant cover, which is only available in this campaign, there’s a $19 tier for that. It also comes with an extra sticker.

If you want the holofoil, then that one is 29. These ones are going to be super limited. Like these won’t exist outside of this campaign for the next 30 days. So if you are listening to this in the future, sorry you missed out. You might be able to snag one in an upcoming campaign if there’s extras. But if you really want this hollow foil, and you should, you can get it right now for 29. And then we’ve got a couple other tiers after that. We’ve got a 55th anniversary special for $55 that has the main cover and the foil cover and a sticker sheet and some other goodies.

Here’s the best value. Basically, there’s a dollar 99 cosmic conspiracy tier over 40% off of all the different things that are included. So this one’s going to come with the main cover, the variant cover, the hollow foil cover, three or four different sticker sheets. It’s going to come with sticks plus stickers. It has the trading card, a bookmark. It has a custom paranoid American. Room 237 keychain. And I think the highlight of this is it’s going to come with this custom embroidered Stanley Kubrick patch based on the Apollo eleven design. And there’s a. Keep scrolling down, you can see all the other extra reward tiers.

All of the different items are going to be described in more detail. And I want to show you this patch right here, the three inch embroidered iron on patch. You can put it on your molex bag. You can put it on, you know, anything. Hats, backpacks. This is the first time we’ve ever done one of these custom patches. So I’m really excited about that. There’s also a custom fake moon landing playset that you can select as an add on when you go to check out. So speaking of, let’s say that you’re sold. You want to get a copy.

You want to help support paranoid Americana. If you haven’t used Kickstarter before, the easiest thing to do is you just click on this back, this project button on the page. It’s both at the very top of the screen and it’s at the top of the page. So you can click either one back, this project, and from here it’s going to be like a typical checkout. You’re going to select which of these different tiers you want. Again, I highly recommend this dollar 99 cosmic conspiracy combo. It’s going to have every single thing that the campaign has to offer that’s exclusive to this NASA book.

You click on that, you pick the country that you’re in, and then you just click on the pledge button. There’s one extra last step where it’s going to ask you if you want to do any add ons. If you want to throw in like a trading card pack or another keychain or anything else, you can get some huge discounts on the backlog of paranoid american comics. But let’s say you’re done with that. You click continue, and then finally, if you don’t already have a Kickstarter account, you’ll be prompted to make one. You can link it to Facebook.

The rest of the flow is just like any typical checkout online. So I really appreciate if you would take a look, please just back the comic back nasacomic.com anyways, back to your regularly scheduled programming. Good evening, listeners, brave navigators of the enigmatic and the concealed. Have you ever felt the pull of the unanswered, the allure of the mysteries that shroud our existence? For more than a decade, a unique comic publisher has dared to dive into these mysteries, unafraid of the secrets they might uncover. This audacious entity is paranoid American. Welcome to the mystifying universe of the paranoid american podcast.

Launched in the year 2012, Paranoid American has been on a mission to decipher the encrypted secrets of our world. From the unnerving enigma of mkultra mind control, to the clandestine assemblies of secret societies, from the awe inspiring frontiers of forbidden technology, to the arcane patterns of occult symbols in our very own pop culture, they have committed to unveiling the concealed realities that lie just beneath the surface. Join us as we navigate these intricate landscapes, decoding the hidden scripts of our society and challenging the accepted perceptions of reality. Folks, I’ve got a big problem on my hands.

There’s a company called Paranoid American making all these funny memes and comics. Now, I’m a fair guy. I believe in free speech as long as it doesn’t cross the line. And if these AI generated memes dare to make fun of me, they’re crossing the line. This is your expedition into the realm of the extraordinary, the secret, the shrouded. Come with us as we sift through the world’s grand mysteries, question the standardized narratives, and brave the cryptic labyrinth of the concealed truth. So strap yourselves in, broaden your horizons, and steal yourselves for a voyage into the enigmatic heart of the paranoid american podcast, where each story, every image, every revelation brings us one step closer to the elusive truth.

We’ve got the one and only Sam newsman who’s on us with sing tank on Tuesdays. If you’re not familiar with Sam the news man, you should be tuning in. Tuesdays, 09:00 p.m. eastern. 11:00 p.m. eastern on YouTube, Andre Zurda’s channel shout out. But this is actually going to be about Sam learning a little bit about the true psyche behind who Sam is. But first of all, what’s your official plug? Like, tell people where to find you and do all do the thing. Do the thing. It’s the thing. Well, broadcasting live deep from an underground military bunker or a spaceship high above the plane of earth, from the most trusted puppet and mediaev reporting since Roswell, I’m Sam Newsman.

And yes, you can find me online at Sam newsman all over social media. That’s at Sam Newsman. And of course, every Saturday morning, 09:00 a.m. to noon eastern time, one WDCE, 90.1 fm. You can listen to that by going to wdce.org or downloading the live 365 app search for WDCE, you’ll be able to listen to the show live. And it is the only award winning radio show dedicated to the magic and nostalgia of Saturday morning, hosted by me, a real media puppethe. So thank you so much, of course, for allowing me to be on the show.

Well, not just allowing, like, thank you for letting us get some insight that I don’t know if anyone’s ever gotten from Sam newsman yet. We always get your take on modern events. We also talk a lot about Saturday morning, which we’re going to do today, because, funny enough, I grew up and we had Saturday mornings, so that’s something that I feel like I can share with other people. But I really want to get into. And we’re going to do more plugs in a little bit. But I want to know, as a puppet, do you feel pain? Actually, should I even call you a puppet? Is that, is that a.

The right term? Is that a bad word? No, puppet. Puppet is fine. Puppet is fine. Well, because I am a puppet. The most trusted puppet in media. I guess the thing is, is that a lot of times you have humans that are called puppets or you have this media puppet, you have this political puppet, and, you know, this, these are these corporate puppets and blah, blah, blah, people just use that term, just throw it around. You know, I could get upset. Puppetism and all. A bunch of puppetists just slinging around words. But I don’t. I understand, of course, they’re just trying to use.

But it could be considered derogatory. And, you know, in some circles, oh, you say the wrong thing, you get canceled. But you know what? I’m not, I’m not writing a butthurt report about it or anything. So I’m not whining, but I did want to bring it to people’s attention. Puppetism is real. I think that you’re actually correct. The four gurus tell us that words do have power and you have to say what you actually mean. So let me ask you some of, like, the preliminary. So let’s get some terminology worked out here. Strings or no strings.

Is that, is that like a puppet versus marionette sort of thing? Or can I call things with, can I call you a thing? Or is that seems more offensive than puppets? No, no, I’m a puppet. I’m a puppet. A marionette is a puppet. You can call a marionette a marionette or a puppet. As far as strings go, a lot of people use these terms, these metaphors and daily life. People always talk about the trump card. And of course, now that rings completely a lot different now. But, but even before, you know, but a while ago, you would just say trump card and it would just be, well, I’m just talking about cards.

You say trump card now and a whole bunch of other things that comes into mind. That’s right. We can’t really play spades without getting political. Now, see, we’re going to have to change up what a trump card is. Yeah. Okay. Well, fish, you know, old maid, let me get into some logistics here. I want to know, do you feel pain as a puppet? Do you have like a nervous system? Well, I don’t feel pain in terms of the way that humans feel pain. Now, of course, if I ended up getting attacked by a dog and my stuffing all ripped out of, well, just know that I would be back.

Because you know what? The puppet doctors, well, they’re fantastic. Might be a little while, but, you know, I would come back. So I don’t ever worry about pain in terms of the physical aspect. We were just talking a little few moments ago about words. You know, do. Do words hurt? You know, sticks and stones will break my bones, but words will never hurt me. Well, I’m not really sure, but offense is a choice, is it not? It’s like happiness is a choice. You choose to be offended, so I choose not to really worry about it. But I could be offended, and I could feel pain.

You know, when I feel pain, feel pain. When everybody and anybody says, sam the news, mandy, that’s when I feel pain, because I’m always just like, the news man. What are you talking about? Is the. Your middle name people like? No, it’s not mine either. It’s. It’s a little bit forward of you to think that nobody does have the middle name. The. Well, you know, maybe there is somebody out there that has the middle name or the middle name. Is that how you say. Could I say Sam the marionette newsmanda? Well, no, because I don’t have strings.

I don’t have strings like a marionette. If I was a marionette, I’d have a couple of strings over here on this arm. Couple. So if we just put strings on you right now, then you’re. You just instantly become a marionette. There’s really no other qualification for it. Well, there is a couple of other qualifications. Usually marionettes. Some of the old ones made of wooden, uh, the old school. The old school marionettes. There’s still puppeteers and puppet makers that make those string puppets. I guess you could just throw some strings and say it’s a marionette. People would just pass it by.

But technically speaking, marionettes. A little bit more TLC behind the scalpel, you know what I mean? How. How does the puppet world feel about Geppetto? Good guy, bad guy? Geppetto, meaning Pinocchio’s dad slash artificer. Oh, that Geppetto. Well, it’s interesting. You talk. You think about Pinocchio. So he. He starts as a marionette and becomes a puppet and then becomes a real boy. Well, marionette is a puppet, but it almost implies that a marionette is on, like, this hierarchy of puppets, like a puppeteers, as you might kind of look at it. So you start out, if you use Pinocchio as your baseline.

He starts out as a marionette, but because a marionette requires external force in order to even move the limbs, then it becomes a puppet. And now the puppet removes that facade of requiring. Or I guess it presents a new facade that they don’t require. Require external force because there’s no strings. But then the next iteration is becoming a real. Boy. Is. Does that not imply a real hierarchy or is just as Disney programming? Disney programming. Because we all know that the whole Pinocchio Disney programming was a foreshadow to Epstein island. Oh, oops. Wait. Are we allowed to say that? We can totally say that.

I don’t know if we all actually know that, though. Does the puppet world know about this? Well, listen. Well, of course the puppet world knows. That’s why with the puppets, you usually try to stay away from that place. Good grief. I guess I just assume the hermetic principle of as above, so below persists in every different facet of existence. So I just assumed that there was, like, a puppet Epstein and a puppet Epstein island. I realized that we share the same reality. Like, you’re just a regular guy, just like anyone else. You just happen to be a puppet.

Right. But is there not. Go ahead. Is there not, you know, puppet versions of everything that we’re seeing as well? When you say puppet versions of what we’re seeing, could you go into that JFK puppet assassination, a puppet Epstein Island, a puppet Trump getting clipped in the ear. Like, are there not one for one, variations on this? Because we don’t get puppet news, right? We, unless we’re listening to Sam newsman. But if I turn into any of my media, I don’t get any puppet information whatsoever. If I tune into you, I get some puppet information, and I get real world information.

But how come we’re not getting an insight into your world? Well, that’s a very interesting question. Goes back to, you know, handshakes, secret societies, things that I can’t really talk about. You know, you can’t really get too much into the secrets of the puppet world. And to be quite honest, it’s really not that great. A lot of puppets, if you think about it, have what we call a perma prostate. What’s a perma prostate? Well, that’s the puppeteer’s hand up the back end of a puppet. People would say, that’s terrible. That’s terrible. Some people said pump. Some puppets would say, it feels quite good.

But then some puppets have to worry about fingers all up in different things, and it just gets really disturbing. Talk about where hands are and where hands have been. Who’s made this? Who’s touched that? It’s a dark world. It’s a dark puppet world. I don’t think we want to get there. Go there. Are there uses for puppet poppers? Puppet poppers? Puppet poppers. I mean, if you’re getting fingers and hands jammed up your rear all the time, it seems like puppet poppers would help the situation a little bit. Man, if only the pupper poppers would help. I don’t think that they can help some of these human handlers.

They’re the worst. That’s why I just try to stick with one producer. Next thing you know, you have a bunch of producers, then a bunch of executives, and then everybody has their hand up your puppet rear. It’s ridiculous. Got to stay with that. Does every puppet require a human puppet master handler? Are there any puppets that. That can operate on their own free will? Well, I guess in terms of animating on their own, no, there’s always a handler. Just like any organization, there’s a handler. So handlers are necessary in the hierarchy of the puppet world. So, look, and so you asked me earlier, get some secrets inside.

Look at them. Already telling. Can I tell them that stuff? Okay. They said, we don’t want to get you in any trouble. We don’t want to get you stringed up to get in trouble. I’m trying. I just want to make sure. Right. Okay. They say it’s okay. They say it’s okay. So, you know, I’m getting phone calls tomorrow saying, you said this on what? I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. Well, I didn’t say this. You actually said that there are puppet secret societies. So I want to know a little bit more. Are there secret degrees within puppet secret societies the same way that a lot of, you know, I guess ancient mystery schools and freemasonry, we’ve got.

Those have degree systems, right. So are there degrees or steps or puppeteers? I would say there are what you would consider degrees, but I’m not going to exactly say what they are to, because that’s a secret. But it’s similar to the idea of degrees in terms of hierarchy. Well, can’t get into that, but I will say that it is a learning experience. Goes a long way, and it takes a while, takes time. A lot of times people say, well, I’m just going to start playing with a puppet like you would an action figure toy. It’s not that easy.

Not that easy. I’ve got this. Might be in the weeds a little bit, but I feel like this is the only opportunity that I’m going to have to ask questions of someone that’s got such firsthand knowledge of this. So are you familiar with the ship of Theseus? The what? The ship. The ship of Theseus. Talk to me about that. Okay. The ship of Theseus, and I’m going to butcher this. Sorry, Andreas, if you’re watching, but ship of Theseus essentially is like this philosophical problem where if you have a boat, and I believe it was the way that the Romans figured out how to build phoenician ships by taking them apart little by little and reconstituting them, and they basically stole all the secrets of the phoenician ships.

But one of the premises here was that if you have a ship and you replace one plank on that ship, it’s still the same ship, right? It just happens to have one new plank. Well, what happens when you replace half the planks on that ship? Is it still the same ship? Is it only half the same ship? What if you just, over time, if you just replace one plank, but every time you replace a plank, it’s a completely different plank, so that at some point, you replaced every single physical item on the entire ship slowly. Is it still the same ship? Well, it is design wise, material wise, possibly not.

So at what exact moment does it become not the old ship and the new ship? Is it like, right when you hit a 51%? Is it like a bitcoin attack? Like, what is the actual delineation? And I guess that’s the philosophical problem, is that you can’t really put your finger on the exact moment when you’re like, and now it’s a new ship. Yeah, I’m not. Well, why? Because I would still look at it as the same ship. I would just say that it’s been renovated. Right. And that the term that they use. So you’re very open minded when it comes to ship of theseus.

So the reason that I brought this up wasn’t just to go on a random tangent, but that if we have a puppet that has a handler, I’m assuming that’s usually one hand, but let’s say that they get two hands in there to do a lot of extra work. Right now there’s two hands inside the puppet. Is that still a puppet? I’m going to assume yes. So now let’s say they stick their head inside there. Let’s just say they put their entire body inside the puppet. At a certain point, it almost is like the puppet becomes an outfit for a person.

Is there a certain moment in time when a puppet would cease to be a puppet. Because of the extra human inside of them? Well, I would say the puppet could actually be a puppet and more human from its very beginning and onset. It’s just the master of the handler itself, if that makes sense to you. Is this so puppet master is such a classic term. There’s great movie series. But puppet Master has also taken on the meaning of kind of one that controls all. This is the Illuminati. This is like the super elites. They’re puppet masters, right? Correct.

Are there real puppet masters? That is like a skeleton key of the puppet world. Well, I think the key. Am I allowed to say this? Are you asking a puppet master right now? I’m asking the producer. Producers. Behind the glass over there. Isn’t the producer a puppet master producer as well? Yeah, producer is. He’s the producer. Mister, is this like the grand producer of the universe? Just a producer. My producer. Okay, okay. That’s one of the. Yeah, listen, all these questions. I don’t have a producer. So, I mean, I don’t. I don’t know exactly how it works.

Well, I’ll add a producer and the producer follows me around. And, you know, whenever I do the shows, the Saturday shows, make sure that everything. That all the buttons are pushed correctly. Because, you know, I have these little felt fingers here. You see that? I mean, I started pushing buttons and moving sliders with these. I mean, it’ll be a disaster. Disaster. So you got to have the producers. You guys okay over there behind the glass? Yeah. Okay. All right. So what was that question again you asked me? I want to know if there’s an actual puppet master.

Like, if pup. If being a puppet master in the context of actual puppets. Does that mean that they can stick their hand into any puppet and have full control? And if so, what would make that different for me? Like, can I just stick my hand up any puppet? Well, I guess the key to all of this, and I think I remember where I was going with this answer. The key to all of it is imagination. The key for mastering of puppetry is the power of imagination. You know that thing you lost when you were a child.

The foundation of creativity. The ability to dream and the determination to reach the stars. Imagination. That’s the key. And then there’s work. Malcolm Gladwell talks about 10,000 hours you have to hang out with a puppet for a while. In order for the puppet to accept its place. And realize that it’s an arbiter of imagination is like breaking in like a new puppy or what. Like, it sounds almost like there’s an acclamation period in which, I mean, does the puppet here have to court the puppet in some way? Like, are you both feeling each other out? Or is this, like, a one way feel? Well, once again, it goes back to imagination.

The puppet master has to have the imagination and the childlike wonder of that imagination, that imagination, that of that of a child purity of heart and understanding that its connection to others allows them to tap into their own imagination. And that’s the key. I think that’s a perfect segue into something that we definitely both share. We were talking about Saturday mornings and Saturday morning cartoons pretty much raised me. And it wasn’t because I was an absolute latchkey kid. Like, I had parents and they cared, but I was obsessed with Saturday morning cartoons. In fact, I think I might have had the good parents that were like, no, you have to go out and play soccer, or, no, you should go and take art lessons or something.

You’re not sitting inside and watching cartoons on a Saturday morning. And that was the only thing I wanted to do because of that strong programming. And I guess that’s. That’s first where I want to get into this is, is the Saturday morning cartoon culture that at least I grew up with in the eighties and nineties. I know you’re a little bit older than I am, but in the eighties and nineties, I look back on it with nostalgia, even though so much of that has kind of been canceled just because it was seen as manipulative and predative marketing towards children and that, like, you’re not allowed to put toys in cereal anymore.

They’re not allowed to advertise action figures that are based on the cartoon that you just saw. But that is what made the eighties and nineties. And, like, I felt like that imagination where I actually believe I was an idiot. And maybe you can shed some light on this, but the original guess who cart commercials, this was a little game that you would, like, flip up and say, is your person old? And if their person was black, you lost immediately because you always knew it was that one guy. But the original commercial had the characters talking, like, the little pieces, and they would say, hey, does your person have glasses? And you would see him go, like, well, I guess it’s not me.

And the kid would flip the little piece down. And years later, I was at a friend’s house, and that commercial came on, and on the very bottom of the screen, it said, warning pieces do not actually talk. You know, it was like, part of the commercial, and he was saying, like, what kind of idiot out there actually thought that these stupid guess who pieces, you know, actually talked? And I never spoke up, but that idiot was me. Like, I actually believe that. And I thinking back, in retrospect, I wonder, is that because, like you say, imagination is the key? Like, was that because I had a great imagination, or was I just suckered and programmed exactly like they were trying to program me? Well, in that certain situation, that is a program.

That is a programming, because you should know that the pieces will talk back to you. But if you enjoyed it, it’s no different than suspending disbelief when you’re watching a movie. It was as a child, you were suspending disbelief and thinking, oh, my gosh, the game actually is going to talk to me now if you go and actually buy the game. And you were upset as a kid. Well, you should have known better than that. Well, no, my parents definitely did not get me. Guess who? I just remember the first time I played it, and I was very disappointed.

But I have to just mention the irony that you’re telling me that I should have known that the pieces don’t talk and I’m talking to a puppet right now that’s telling me that I should have known better. Well, only the reason why is because you just said that it was a. There was a warning label at the bottom of the screen, right? Well, no, that. That warning label came years after the original commercials came out. The original commercials did not have the disclaimer, so I anticipated that the pieces actually talked. I didn’t understand the logistics of how much money it would have cost to put little tiny screens inside of everything.

You know, I was, I don’t know, six or seven or something when this game originally started getting marketed. How long was it until you finally got your hands on a guess who game? And you were like, oh, damn it, this sucks. Oh, yeah. About a year or two later, the game didn’t suck, but I was absolutely shocked, and I thought maybe the kid just had a knockoff. And originally I figured he had, you know, the dollar store version. Yeah. It wasn’t the electronic edition like battleship. The bad is the battery less one. That’s what it was.

What, you got the. You got the cheap version? Oh, man, these don’t talk to me. Okay. So I guess the underlying question that I was fishing around originally was, is there a guess who where the pieces actually talk? You seem like you would know, but I guess I really was just an idiot. And it wasn’t just an overactive imagination. I got programmed by the commercial. But the same thing about my affinity towards he man and Gi Joe and Thundercats and almost every one of the, you know, the cartoons that I grew up with, I think that was reinforced by the marketing, which was later deemed as, like, a bad thing.

So imagination, I feel like, did that help imagination? Does it hurt imagination to have all this, like, synergy between the manufacturing and the marketing and the content? Well, no, I think it brings, it fosters imagination. I think it fosters imagination because think about Saturday mornings, what you did. Number one, it was the only morning where you actually wanted to wake up the rest of the week. You know, you had, you know, the rest of the rest of the week, you had to wake up and ride the cheese wagon for school. You don’t want to wake up.

Maybe in middle school, I think elementary school was still kind of fun to go to school. Maybe that was just me. Well, I mean, I’m thinking. You thought so? I pretty sure that I enjoyed most element when kickball was like the thing that you did for sports. And then once they took recess away, I think that was kind of when you realized, oh, this is actually a prison. And then you realize it was always a prison. Well, you think about Saturday morning. You were asking about, are we corrupted because we had the cartoon and the action figure.

But if you’re like many children, when you woke up on Saturday morning, what did you do? You went and you grabbed your favorite action figure. You ran down the stairs, you grabbed that sugary bowl of cereal. You sat in front of the television. Yes, sometimes. And you played out while the show was on with your figures. Play along, fostering imagination playtime, as opposed to a scream, a bunch of digital buttons. I mean, I mean, that’s kind of what I’m getting at. So you would have your Nintendo cereal or your Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles serial and your teenage mutant ninja Turtle Spoon and the action figure just so that you could watch it.

Come on. But that seems like peak programming. That is peak mkultra. Um, you know, kalebo slash. Any, any sort of corporate entity like that is what they feed off of. They want every kid to be wearing the shirt and the slippers and have the sleeping bag, all of it. And I was that kid for, I guess for Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. That was definitely me. But, and I, and I look back on that fondly, but by today’s standards, that’s the worst thing. Like that was me smoking cigarettes, basically. You think that the Ninja Turtles are smoking, are like smoking cigarettes.

I mean, there’s a reason why they don’t have Ninja Turtle cereal with toys inside and advertising the toys on the same cartoon, or at least why that era kind of came to an end. I think it could have a resurgence, but now it wouldn’t hit the same because we were kind of unaware of the programming that was being put on us. I guess the ultimate question here, if I’m getting the one, is that I look back on fondness to that programming. And even if it was MkUltra, and even if it was corporations carefully crafting my entire psyche so that I would desire these material goods, I don’t hate them for it.

And in fact, I still look back on all that fondly, and I realized the rose colored glasses, nostalgia and all that, but it still seems like a much better alternative to what kids are growing up with now. Absolutely. You hit the nail on the head with that one. Rather have children eating sugary bowls of cereal of ninja turtles and Nintendo and playing with action figures and toys than just soaking in iPads and foods with seed oils. I guess so. Why is that, though? What if the next iteration is just NFT action figures and that kids growing up now, when they’re 30 or 40, they look back and they’re like, oh, man, that was so great that I got to have an iPad all the time.

I think eventually people will recognize the fact that an NFT is a big scam. It is a ridiculous scam. Absolutely ridiculous. Anything digital. It’s like, oh, hey, check out this digital thing I got. There’s only one of one. Yeah, until somebody knows how to edit correctly, this is, this is actually an interesting thread here, because it is this Sam newsman talking about the digital world being B’s, or is this something pervasive in, like, the puppet world that. Do all puppets have an inherent dislike of digital content? Well, anything that has to do with digital, because if you think about puppetry in and of itself, it is an analog art form.

So think about it for a moment. This is an analog form of art puppetry in and of itself. Does AI pose any sort of threat to puppetry in general, or do you think that it’s far removed? Well, I believe that’s where the interesting things. Can we, can we talk about that? Yeah. Okay. So let’s just say we’re not worried about AI on this side at the moment. Hold on. Who’s is we, you and your producer, or is we speaking on behalf of puppets? Exactly. Well, no, no, no. Which, which of the two? Yes. Okay. Yeah. And you’re positive you’re not going to get blindsided? Say that again.

You’re positive you’re not going to get blindsided by AI? No, no, no. Absolutely not. Hell, I think. Don’t you make AI songs? I’m not allowed to talk about that. I’m under NDA now. Oh. See, because I heard through the grapevine that you are quite the music savant. Those are the. That’s what I heard. Now, of course, I might be wrong, sources might be incorrect, but I might have to double check. I think the magic lies in mixing the two. Okay. They said they. All right. So they said they were going to get on it. Okay, check.

I think the magic there, it’s sort of the rule of, like, you have to know what the rules are before you can break them. I really do believe that in a lot of different ways. So if you know how to do the real analog version of an art form, if you know how to do real music, whatever. And I already sat. Sounds so weird, like, if you know the real way to do it, but if you know how to make it without any external tools or, you know, digital tools, then it gives you a really strong footing.

So then when you do the AI version, you can kind of blend it with the, you know, quote unquote real way to do things. And that’s where I, like, I think my interest really lies because that’s where you can get people that either hate it or don’t like it or don’t understand it to kind of get swindled a little bit. Like, it’s not like a nefarious swindling, but it’s a way of, like, blurring the line to the point where someone might say, like, oh, I thought I hated that, or they’ll like it, and then they find out what it was and then decide to hate it.

That’s like my. I wish I could focus on that particular niche, although there’s not really a huge market for, you know, putting out something that people like and then making them not like it. You know, like, unless you’re roman flansky, I guess that’s kind of what you got into. But I. But I feel. Yeah. So AI in that regard. But I guess I’m wondering, couldn’t we just train enough puppeteers and enough, you know, puppet analog footage on AI, how many people would actually be able to tell a difference? Do you think you could tell the difference better than a human watching AI generated puppet footage? Would you be able to point it out immediately.

I think that after probably one watch or so, I would be able to notice something. What would you look for? Stick out. There’d be something a little unnatural with the movements. They wouldn’t be real, like me as a real media puppet. What are. Can you call out any puppets that might be suspect? Like, are there any puppets out there that maybe humans have bought into and we don’t realize that they’re not puppets? Uh, politicians and media figures? Well, those are humans that. That we might not realize are puppets. But are there any puppets that we might not realize are not actually puppets? Like, is big bird, like, an actual bird? Are there any rumors about snuffleupagus? Oh, no, no.

They’re all puppets. They’re all puppets. They’re all part of the crew. Yep. Are there factions? I know, I know you can’t talk about the hierarchy, but are there. Is there, you know, democrat and republican sort of divides? Are there cultural divides? Well, there are some sort of divides, and those would be in. In the form of trademarks, trademarks, licensing. A lot of times people will say, oh, look, it’s Sam. He is a Muppethe, but I’m not a muppet. Muppet is a trademark term of the Henson company now owned by Disney. So I’m not a Muppet. In fact, there was a time when I went to a Trump rally a couple months back.

I think it was back in February. I think it was on leap. Was it? Yeah, it was just right after the leap year. So it was the first weekend, I think, in March. But of course, I show up and I walk around, get some footage, talk to some people, and then secret service shows up, and they said, sam, guess what? We’re going to have to ask you to leave. Oh, that day, they were paying attention, and I said, wait a minute. Right. Exactly. That day, they pay. They paid attention to the muppet. That’s what they said.

They kept calling me a Muppet. I said, hold on. Wait a minute, guys. It’s puppet. It’s puppet. Eventually, eventually, I got them to just call me by my name, Sam, so. But, uh, but we ended up leaving early. Didn’t want to cause a ruckus. The media was there. The human media was there. Oh, lord. They. They were probably the ones that complained, all upset because I was trolling them, taking all their spotlight. Uh, if you refer to yourself as a muppet, is that. Is that considered stolen valor? Well. Well, I don’t know if it’s valor. Anything owned by Disney Valor these days? Star wars valor, Marvel Valor, I think anything owned by Disney now.

There’s no valor attached to it anymore. Poor Disney. I just missed the old Clamshell VHS tapes. The good old. I mean, that sounds like more mkultra programming. Like, that’s just you bonding to your programming. Is it nothing? No. Didn’t you like opening up the clamshells? That’s what I’m saying. But I believe that those clamshells were engineered, basically give you a hit of dopamine every time that you interacted with them. The. The ratio that you would interact with, it probably has some kind of golden ratio, properties where it just feels good to be in your hand. The weight ratio, the exact margin.

I mean, and I’m not even kidding about this, the exact margin and the lip that, like, I remember flipping the little lip on those clamshell cases with my thumbs. I would watch a movie, and it would, like, feel great on my thumb because of the thickness and the rigidity. And, like, just everything about those things became a tactile sensation as you watch this movie. And again, it’s like a full blown mk ultra programming experience where they are flooding every single sense. I mean, I don’t remember any that had, like, a scratch and sniff, but that would have been the only thing missing from the full production.

Right, right. What would it smell? What would the Little Mermaid smell like? What part would you rub on the COVID Probably the priest. Oh, wait. Let me ask you about Disney movies. Do you have a top three Disney animated movies? Well, I would sit there, and if you think about animated movies and Disney animated movies, I don’t want to get into top three. I would tell you my favorite Disney movie or film. So just top one. Absolutely. It would be Mary Poppins. Go on. Well, she hangs out with cartoons. She’s a human that hangs out with cartoons.

She’s a human that hangs out with a chimney sweep and some kids with cartoons. That’s amazing. I don’t see. I have. I have a series called Occult Disney that we go and review every one of these original Disney movies, and we’ve done Mary Poppins. We’ve done pretty much every single one that has any animation in it. And I don’t want to completely ruin it for you, but Mary Poppins, I really believe, is, uh, sort of nefarious in many ways. And I’m talking about the. The person herself. Mary Poppins is sort of a evil black witch. She’s kind of a marina Abramovich in a certain kind of context, because she comes into these kids lives.

She brings them to this fantastical world. She gaslights them immediately after. Imagine. Imagine someone introducing, you know, them to Sam Newsmandae and saying, oh, my God, you know, I actually got to talk to a real puppet. And then afterwards they say, no, no, that never happened. You never actually talked to any puppet. That puppets can’t talk. Puppets only actually exist as something for television. And that. That gaslighting to a child, right. You just blew this little kid’s mind. You just made them aware of these different dimensions and realities and different things they can interact with and then told them, no, no, you’re going crazy.

You just imagined all that. That feels like. Like a cruel, cruel thing to do to a kid, especially as the person that knows unequivocally that all of that is possible. Wouldn’t that sound like a nefarious thing to do to somebody? Well, that’s why I always tell everybody every Christmas that Santa Claus is real. I mean, hell, NORAD’s tracking him, so don’t tell me that he’s not. But see, Mary Poppins is the person that tells you Santa’s not real, is she? She is. If you. If you go back and watch the movie after they. They come back and they’re talking to Mary Poppins about all these wonderful things that they didn’t said, she starts denying it for a small moment in time, which I don’t really understand the premise of that, but she absolutely does that, and it feels wrong.

And then if you look into Dick Van Dyke’s character and the whole chimney sweep, that’s another version of, like, a cult british magic. Like the. The fact that they would use the coal and. And all of the dust from the chimney that was actually seen as good luck. And if you shook one of their hand, you weren’t supposed to wash your hand for a while. But all of this was kind of indoctrinating young kids into the very inner workings of real occult magic without any of the disclosure that usually would go along with it if it weren’t for some sort of, like, secretive means.

So for. For that one, I guess I’m making a small case. The Mary Poppins, out of all the Disney movies, might actually have some of that nefarious programming built into it. Well, all I have to say is this. Just a spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down. That sounds like propaganda, my friend. Actually, what that is is alchemy. And you’re absolutely right that she is some sort of witch. But is she a bad witch? Is she a good witch? Is telling kids that, oh, well, that’s a bunch of nonsense. After they had a great time doing a bunch of nonsense.

Is that bad? We don’t want, I guess. I think when I think about that scene, you think about the parents and how separated from the children the parents really were. And during this time, Mary Poppins brings the children closer to their parents over the course of the film, to the point where it even had to deal with money in and of itself and the symbolism of how powerful just a coin can be. But even though Mary Poppins is a witch, as you say, she brings together the family at the end of the movie, and as she goes her merry way.

See what I did there? As she goes her merry way? The family’s together, so let’s go fly a kite, I think. And I can tie this all the way back into eighties nineties cartoons, too, because I feel like Mary Poppins is the perfect sort of representation of telling kids, yeah, your toys can talk to you. Yeah. If you buy this cereal that, you know, Donatello might actually invite you over for pizza one day, like, actually implanting all of these thoughts and then having it all ripped away from you, saying, oh, no, now you’re not allowed to have toys in your cereal anymore.

Now you’re not allowed to have action figures marketed to you. It’s kind of the same thing of saying, like, oh, all those things that we said were okay, and we’re just normally for your most formative years, by the way, none of that can happen anymore. And, in fact, it shouldn’t have happened, and here’s why. That it’s almost like a Mary Poppins scenario. They did that, and they did it well. Fact, it was 1990. It was 1990 when they passed the Children’s Television act. But it was about six years afterwards before they finally implemented it. And when they finally did implement it, that’s when the cartoons went away.

That’s when the toys went away, cereals went away. Everything went away at that point. And for better, for worse. I don’t know. I know a lot of children during the late nineties that were really upset. They felt like their cartoons were just getting started. What do you think were the biggest casualties? What was that? What were the biggest casualties out of all this? Was it the action figures? Was it the cereals? Was it the toys inside the cereals? I think it was that whole thing that you mentioned earlier, that moment in time where you could go and grab a figure and the cereal and watch the show all at once.

It was a grand old time programming at its best, but fostering your imagination at the same time. What say you? What about smoking? You know how smoking used to be in cartoons all the time, and now you barely even see it in tvs and movies. What do you think about? Yeah, what do you think about smoking in cartoons? Well, I don’t have a problem with smoking in cartoons just because it is real life. Now, I know that some child might see the cartoon and some of the. Oh, well, let’s just do it. You know what that does? That’s just encouraging kids to smoke.

Well, like, a kid’s gonna go just grab a cigarette and start smoking. But I think that’s where the problem is. They wanted to sit there, try to protect the kids. But if you go back, there was a cartoon called Bravestar back in 1987. Remember? Actually, all of the cartoons in the eighties, they have a little psa at the end of the show, you know, knowing it’s half the battle. Gi Joe and he man would say, today, skeletor, blah, blah, blah. And there was a lesson. Well, there was a character in Bravestar called Scuz, and Scuzz smoked, and he smoked all the time.

And the main bad guy, Tex hex, always told him he shouldn’t be smoking. And on one episode, there was a psa with Scuz telling kids, even though I smoke, it’s bad and you shouldn’t, so don’t smoke. As far as smoking in cartoons, I don’t have a problem with it, so long as there’s people around the children to educate kids of what good decision making is all about. Now, there’s some crossover between puppets and the drugs as well, because I remember growing up, too, some of those psas, they actually had puppets. One of them, the more famous ones, I think busta rhymes adapted into one of his songs that got made onto the psycho remake.

But it was too much of us is dangerous. It’s so dangerous. And I believe that was a puppet ad. And it almost seemed like for some reason, if you tried to do an anti drug psa in cartoons, it didn’t really hit the same way. There was, like, a famous special, I think it was like an hour long special that had, like, every damn cartoon character in it. And it was all about drugs and guns, I think. And it was nowhere as cool as it should have been based on that premise. But the puppet ads seem like they had more of a very serious tone to them.

Like what? What is it that puppets doing drugs and cartoon characters doing drugs is somehow vastly different? Well, once again, puppets are real. I’m not arguing on that point. I’m just wondering, because I didn’t grow up knowing that puppets real. I think I actually grew up with a bunch of puppet tests. Is that. Would that be the right way to phrase that? Those people who are anti puppets? Or. Or, I mean, is it worse to be anti puppethe or to deny the existence of puppets altogether? That’s the hard one. You know, I always. I’ve run into people years and years for years now.

Someone will come up and I’ll tell them. It’s like, hey. And they’re like, ugh. I’m like, what? And they’re like, you’re a puppet. Like, what’s wrong with that? Puppets scare me. Puppets scare you? Well, I don’t like puppets. And I just wonder, what tragic moment in their childhood did they have that made them not love puppets? I don’t know. Listen, I have interviews with me interviewing kids. Kids love me. Hell, adults love me. But then when you find the adult that doesn’t love me, not that I need to have everybody that loves me, but I’m like, what happened to your imagination as a kid? Poor thing.

I wish them well. Maybe they will get back their imagination. Can we talk about your childhood a little bit? Well, no. What do you mean, no? There’s nothing really there. Well, there is something there, because. Don’t you have some sort of link with UFO technology? What do you mean, link with UFO technology? I believe that. That you were around during Roswell, or you might have, like, started your career around Roswell, or. Am I getting this completely wrong? Never tell you that story about Roswell, about what happened that night. Show up? Is it a firsthand account? Yeah.

Well, yes, it is. In fact, I said it on the radio for the first time about two weeks ago for the anniversary of Roswell. Nobody’s ever really heard that story. And I’ll tell you, it was difficult here. I show up in New Mexico. I show up in New Mexico on assignment. I have nothing but just, hey, Sam, go to New Mexico. I say, where? They say, Roswell. So I show up at Roswell. Next thing you know, I’m out in this ranch. Bunch of debris all over the ground. Newspaper says UFO, because the military said, oh, by the way, we covered a UFO.

So here I am looking at all this debris, and then the superiors came up to me and they said, sam, we have a mission for you. And I said, well, what’s that? I’d say, well, we have an assignment. It’s a tough one, but we know that you can handle it. When I said, okay, and they said, sam, we need you to go back and tell everyone it’s a weather balloon. What, does this look like a weather balloon to you? All this stuff on the ground. Yes, we know, Sam, but you’re the one that can sit there and say it with a straight face.

I asked him if I had a choice, and that’s when I had to sign the NDAs. Oh, God, the NDAs. This. See, every time you get to this part of the story, this is where the NDA’s come up. And I was hoping that we might have been able to poke a little hole in the armor this time. Well. Well, what I did is I did what I was told to do. I went out, said, hey, guys, it’s a weather balloon. Next day, the media ran with it, the published media, and I think that’s where it all started.

I mean, this sounds eerily similar to the origins of William Cooper, you know, infamous offer behind behold a pale horse. But he also got his start. I believe his was in naval intelligence as opposed to journalism, actually. Were you in the military? Negative. Was not in the military, but working in the media. We work alongside our industrial complex partners. When called upon, the way you responded negative immediately almost seemed like something a military person would have done. Well, I said that we work alongside of our industrial complex partners, but that’s about as clear as I could make that statement.

So, similar to William Cooper, who basically was originally a disclosure agent. And I think also around the UFO phenomenon, where he claimed later on in life that his original job was to kind of, you know, kick up a little bit of muddy when it came to UFO’s and alien technology, and to just spread a little bit of false rumors here and there, get people believing it not in necessarily like a national news breaking sense, but in a way that you could disseminate to the people that might be more receptive. This and that. You know, I assume that this was for reasons of spreading chaos, because chaos is easy for this complex to kind of use against us.

So is that what you were doing? Were you spreading chaos just so that the rest of the human population could be controlled better? Or was there something that was actually to be found there? Are you still under NDA about all of this? Well, I can talk about a few things. First thing is little gray green men, or whatever color you want to call them. That is not the case. What about little pink men? You mean like myself? Well, you’re a little pink puppet. There you go. I don’t know about little pink men. Those are parades in June.

Right? But when you say little gray and green men. Are we playing semantics right now? Because I’d agree. They probably didn’t find little green men. They found little green or little gray. Fill in the blank. I don’t know what you would call them. They probably don’t want to be called things either. Were they things that were found, though? That’s my question. You’re the reporter here that was on the scene. You tell us. I’m going to say it again. There was no little gray or green men. I mean, how much clearer do I need to be? I mean, it’s within the statement.

Right there. There’s. There’s some. There’s a there there in that statement. It is not little green or gray men, but what could it be? I do appreciate that. Um, what. What exactly makes you still want to be a reporter, even today? Like, how many people are listening to you versus going on to tick tock and getting the news there? Because that’s where I get my news. I go on and Twitter, and I see what everyone’s flipping out about, and that’s it. Like, I very rarely do. People tell me, hey, tune into this news station. Hey, you got to, like, find out where all this news is that they’re going to just send me a link to Twitter somewhere.

So how is that affecting you as just a news reporter? Well, it doesn’t affect me at all in terms of social media. You can follow me everywhere at Sam Newsmandae, right down there. Right here at Sam Newsman. But I tell people all the time, I am a puppet who has a radio show. I’ve had this radio show now for over six years. Well, I think we celebrate our Saturday morning six year anniversary in September. Is that right? Okay. Okay. Yes. But we’ve been on the air for over six years. First of the first couple of months, we were.

Was it afternoon drive time? But we’ve been doing this radio show for six years now, and I have no idea where the hell I was going with that. Well, do you, does your radio show that you’ve been doing for six years, have you won any awards? Do you have any actual credentials here? Okay, so, yes, we’ve won multiple awards. In fact, we’re up for an award right now. We’re in the middle. Is this a human award or a puppet award? Well, this is a radio award from the Richmond Times Dispatch. It is the newspaper of record, and we’ve won several awards.

Last year, we won third place this year. The corporate radio media stations have been spending thousands of dollars to beat us. Little small little radio show one Saturday morning, but they were now putting their advertising revenue arm up against us. And of course, I say, well, it makes perfect sense. Last thing they want is a puppet to come back, reminding people about the magic and nostalgia of Saturday morning. How imagination, or MK programming, as you called it, is something that needs to be reimagined, recirculated, rebirthed. Saturday morning needs to be alive again. Make Saturday morning great again.

Saturday morning matters. Do you have any merch with that on it? I don’t have any merch right now. I should set up a merch store. There are just some legalities that we’re still figuring out here on the back end when it comes to merchandise and merchandising, but we should have some news about that in the future. I was talking about, of course, the radio show and puppets and social media. Radio is really the key. Been doing it for so long, and eventually people told me, hey, Sam, you may want to get the social media thing going.

It took me a while to even get that. Facebook didn’t want me on there. Everybody wanted me to, I don’t know, pluck off a piece of my hair, give him a thumbprint, maybe spit in a cup. Yeah. What happens when they ask you to provide your identification and take a picture of your id and provide your social? Like, how do you, how do you navigate that kind of space? Do you even have a Social Security number? Well, I just show them the press pass. Yeah, it’s the press pass. Magical skeleton key of identification. I was going to say.

Yeah, you just took the words right out of my mouth. It’s like the skeleton key of skeleton keys with. For ids. Just showing the press pass. Hey, look at me. I’m press pass. And they’re like, okay, Sam, it’s fine. They know it’s me. Listen, I’ve been doing this a long time now. I mean, come on. Get to give me a little bit of credit here, but. But social media is a supplement. I say this all the time. Social media is a supplement, not a substitute. In order to get the real Sam newsman experience, you got to listen to the radio show.

And it is the radio show first, so you can hear my beautiful puppet voice. And as you’re sitting there listening, you might be then thinking, well, that is such a beautiful puppet voice. Does he have a beautiful puppet face? And usually at about 1010, I fire up the Sam cams so you can see my beautiful puppet face. But it is a supplement, not a substitute. Listening to the radio and just my voice, you’ll get the experience that is necessary for you to understand why we are the only award winning radio show dedicated to the magic and nostalgia of Saturday morning, hosted by me, a real media puppet.

Sam, you were mentioning that you’re kind of this underdog and you’re going up against the big dogs out there, like the corporate ones that have got all the lawyer and the Morgan and Morgane, and I’m assuming, like, McDonald’s come, like, you know, the heavy hitters of conventional news radio. How. How do people help elevate it so that the puppet show, so that Sam newsman beats these conventional news stations, that would be the coolest thing ever. Like, how exactly can we help do that? Well, I would say it’s very simple. All you need to do is just pull out your cell phone and text the number one 90.

That’s right. Text the number 1902. 804-375-5011 that’s 804-375-5011 you want to text 190 to that number every single day until July 28. And you want to make sure that you grab every phone in your house and vote with them as well. And all of your coworkers tell them to one 90 280-437-5011 it is literally at your fingertips when it comes to the future of Saturday morning. I don’t think that we’ve ever had a more noble cause that we could advocate for on this program. So if we can get Sam Newsman, the radio show hosted by a puppet, to be out, the actual conventional, you know, mainstream media news in Richmond, what.

What are we doing? Like, that’s what we should be focused on right now. So we’ll actually put this one out as, like, an emergency update to get everyone out there and starting to vote on this now. Give us a little taste of what a real news reporter would do. Like, show us what Sam’s got that these mainstream guys don’t. And I just want to imagine that we’re recounting the Donald Trump assassination attempt in real time. So he’s at the podium, and all of a sudden something whizzes by, like, can we get a little, just a little taste of how Sam might have delivered some of this news going on? Give it.

Give us just a little taste of how Sam newsman would be reporting the Donald Trump assassination in real time. Well, if I was sitting there reporting in real time, it would have been very simple. I would have seen President Trump up on the stage, and I would have seen all of a sudden him duck, and then all of a sudden, a bunch of people saying, oh, yeah, shooting, oh, my gosh. President, secret Service running around. How would I report that? Probably look right into the camera with this award winning stare and say, yeah, it’s about right.

And that would have been the news report. Pretty much. That’s about right. But you know that I do newsreels every single day. Well, now, hold on. Let me, let me, let me restart that. You know that I do news reels quite often on social media. They’re about 1 minute in length where we talk about the news of the day. I try not to put my own commentary in those little newsreels, just kind of tell you what’s going on. It’s about a minute, but usually about five, six stories, and you kind of get an idea of what type of news that I kind of COVID Right now, of course, it’s very political, but there are now, it’s not every day.

Now, we did do it every day for about a year and some change, but we did know that this year some things were going to change here pretty soon. Working on websites, like I said, licensing, merchandising, all that stuff that you were opining or talking about earlier, asking about earlier. We’ll get there. But, yeah, it’s a busy year. Of course, now all of a sudden, it just seems like the roller coaster is getting even more crazier and crazier. What is it? I heard somebody online, they said the word hypernovelty. I think we’re reaching hyper novelty. So who knows? That just sounds like a made up word.

That does sound like a made up word, doesn’t it? That sounds like someone just wants to be able to say they got a new word put into the dictionary, and then they just want to flex on people over that. Hey, that’s true. It could be the case. Could absolutely be the case. But it still sounds cool. I read it on the Internet. Is there a certain, is there a certain political party or candidate that would favor better for puppets in general? No, no, no, no. Now, here’s where it gets interesting, because I can’t speak for my puppet brethren.

But as for myself, I can’t vote. Why say I can’t vote? I don’t vote. How would I be an objective, real media puppet if I was sitting there rooting for a side? The only side I root for is interesting. Gives me something to talk about. I mean, I feel like there’s another side of that coin, though. The other side of that coin could be you could vote for both parties. You could just kind of fund all sides of the war? No. Isn’t that what they already do? Hold on. Wait, wait, wait. Hold up. I wasn’t making sure that I didn’t say too much.

Unbelievable. Isn’t that what they do? What? What are you. Unbelievable. What? Well, you just have to. You have to mute me in order to check with your producers to figure out what things that you can say. Well, because some of the ND. Listen, you were asking about the NDAs. Some of them are expiring, and as they expire, I have to make sure that what I’m talking about is expired or not expired. Just trying to do the right thing here, make everybody happy and still keep a job. Is. Is the economic crunch hitting you as well? Like what? What kind of upkeep do you require? I just require naps.

I don’t require any upkeep, just naps. Well, why do you need a job, then? What do you mean, why do I need a job if all you require are naps? If all I required were naps, then I would just be napping right now, and I wouldn’t even need a job. I wouldn’t have to be interviewing or publishing comics. I would just be napping. Well, yeah, well, I don’t need to have a job. Well, I mean, why have a job? I’m the most trusted puppet in Mediaev, so. But other than what, upkeeper, whatever that you asked, one thing I need, outside of just me setting the standard and raising the bar, is an occasional nap.

Have you ever done drugs? Now, listen here. As far as drugs go, people want to have their vices, typically try to stay away from those. All drugs. Well, give me a good whiskey ginger every now and then. All right, so there’s a little bit of leeway here. What else could you be talked into with enough peer pressure? What do you mean? Well, let’s just say that you’re, you know, in a state where the ganj is now legal. Does that mean that you would partake? Let’s say it was mushrooms were legal. Let’s say you find yourself in the outskirts of Oregon and just pretty much everything is now legal.

Would you just be going ham at it, or is there anything that’s incompatible with you personally? No, not necessarily. But, you know, with just a whiskey. Ginger. Just one. Just one. Make it a double. But just one. That’s where I draw the line. You know, who knows exactly what’ll happen if I start doing some other things. But like I said, just. I just try to keep it simple. Scotch. Okay. I do scotch. You know, I’m a puppet. I’ve been around a long time. People call those old men drinks. I call them old puppet drinks. Nothing like an old fashioned.

Would you ever consider doing PCP? Pcp? Pcp. I’m not going to be doing any PCP. I’m not going to be doing any needles, I’m not going to be sniffing anything. But I will get a contact buzz due to the smoke in the room. But I didn’t have to do anything with that. I’m just in the room. Well, believe it or not, you are going to do some PCP and you’re going to do it right now. Hey, conspiracy buffs, I double dare you to take some PCP, the paranormal conspiracy probe. On your marks, get set and go.

Sam, you are a crafty one, so there is no time for you to think and weasel your way out of this one with NDAs. I’m going to be asking you a series of questions or topics and you’re going to rate them one to ten on how much you believe in the credit of those things. For example, if I said Bigfoot, rate Bigfoot one to 1010, meaning you believe in him, one, meaning you don’t. Where are you at? Bigfoot? Oh, that’s a straight up ten. How about Nephilim? That’s a ten. Mothman, maybe that’s, we’ll say eight. Flat earth.

Eleven. Hollow earth. Hmm, that’s tricky. Start using some of those words and conflate. I would say, five ish. Five ish dinosaurs. Negative. Ten. Fire breathing. Flying dragons. Ooh, fire breathing. Having existed at any point in history. I’m not sure about the fire breathing. That’s where you’re hanging me up is the fire breathing part. You just said dragons. I would say ten, but the fire breathing thing. Well, I’m gonna go two. Jeffrey Epstein killed himself. Uh, there’s not a negative number that, uh, I could even say for that, Hillary Clinton has worn the face of a small child.

Whoa. Frazzled. What’s frail? We can’t even say the word, can we? I mean, you can say it. I’ll just. I’ll just beep it out. Won’t say it. I’ve seen things on the Internet. How does that sound? Well, I’m just looking for a number. I don’t. I don’t need you to opine on it, I just need a number. Eight. The illuminati controls the hip hop industry. Nah. Three angels existed, ten demons. Ten. What’s the likelihood that I could go on Amazon right now, order how to summon demons for dummies and actually summon a demon. You wouldn’t even need the book to do that.

Well, okay, well, the premise here being that, let’s say I was an atheist or agnostic and I didn’t even believe in demonstration, but I was just following a straight up formula that was published by some rando corporation. I guess the real crux of this is, like, do I have to go and dig up an ancient grimoire and get all crusty and do I have to go and sacrifice animals? Or could I just order a book off of a print on demand book, flip open to chapter eight under how to summon Azazel, recite the words, and all of a sudden, you know, I’ve got, like, a black cloud following me around for the rest of my life.

Well, it doesn’t work exactly like. No. How do you. What makes you an expert on how it works? Well, there’s a little bit more than just those type of things in terms of conjuring. I thought, am I supposed to give you a number still? Well, now I want to know what you know about summoning demons, because all of a sudden you became an expert on this. Well, I didn’t say expert. You said expert. Do you know what an expert. You know what expert is? I can’t stand that term, expert. You know, an expert is. You know what x is? X is a variable, righT? X is a variable.

X as a variable. All right. X is a variable in math. Okay, say this all the time. Now, what is a spurt? You familiar with plumbing? You’re going to have to enlighten me. A spurt. A spurt is when you have a pipe and there’s a little small hole in the pipe and the water is shooting out at a VerY High pressure. It’s called a spurt. Spit through your teeth. That’s a spurt, too, right? I guess you don’t have teeth, but when, you know, humans, they can do that. But it’s a little. But you know what? But you see, you know, it kind of has the little.

It looks like it, you know, that has the, you know, the thing sound like Joe Biden, the thing, and it has an arch as it spurts out. So what do we have here? We have x as a variable, and a spurt is nothing more than water under pressure. So an expert I is nothing more than a variable under pressure. I always see that people are like, oh, we have this expert on. We have this expert on, and this person over here is an expert. And I’m saying they’re no expert. No such thing. As an expert. Expert is just a variable under pressure.

That’s why they have three of them on the screen at the same time. We have the three experts here to tell us. Each one’s a different variable. I’m not necessarily an expert. I’m just telling you there’s more to summoning than just reading. Now, if you did just grab the book and started reading, there could be some negative tendencies that start to begin creeping within your life by proxy of reading said material and acting upon that. But in terms of conjuring up the black cloud a little bit more than just that. A little bit more things you need to do than just read the book.

One to ten that Donald Trump assassination attempt was planned by someone other than the shooter. Oh, ten. Oh, I want to hear more about this now. What? What? Cuz. Cuz Sam doesn’t usually have his own takes on some controversial aspects. But that’s a fairly controversial approach, right? Is it a controversial approach? Let me ask you a question. I mean, how often have we seen this happen in american history? It hasn’t happened since Reagan. But who’s always behind it? I just. Oh, yeah, that’s right. It’s the lone gunmande. That’s it. Just the lone gunmen. And, yeah, it just happens to be that there was just a line of sight at the one place and.

Listen, I don’t want to hear any of that stuff. We all know that. Well, let’s just say the Alphabet. Intel agencies. Well, what is. What did Chuck Schumer say? If you go after them, they’ll get you six ways from Sunday. I think he said that. So, inside job? Yes. Staged? Yes. Was he supposed to turn his head? Nope. Well, I’m glad that you kind of brought some of these up, because now I want to. I want to just get your one to ten, real rapid fire, your rating of false flags. So, tell me, on a scale of one to ten, which of these were inside jobs? 911.

Ten. Oklahoma City. Ten. Waco. Ten. Ruby Ridge. Ruby Ridge? Was I around Ruby Ridge? I don’t have anything about Ruby Ridge. I don’t have any. Seven. Seven London bombings. There was more to that than. Well, we just need a number. Yeah, it was a ten. JFK? Ten. RFK? Ten. JFK Junior. Ooh, ten. Well, what. Which part of the JFK junior? Now, that’s the question. Are we talking about him going down in a plane? And it was all because Hillary needed to win that Senate seat? Or that he’s still alive and hanging out behind trumpet rallies by a gentleman by the name of Vincent Fushka or whatever? Is that what you’re asking? Which.

Which. Let’s do both. Let’s. Let’s. Let’s do both jets. That he was taken down intentionally in an airplane crash. Ten. And that he somehow survived that airplane crash and is now showing up behind Donald Trump in rallies. Zero. Okay. So are you not a JFK junior is going to come back and prove Q correct type of person? I don’t think that’s going to be the case. Okay. January 6, inside job. Oh, absolutely. Ten. I want to ask more, but honestly, I also want to air this one on YouTube, and I don’t want to have to just actually, fuck it.

Let’s just do some rumble versions. And I don’t know if Sam Newsman’s allowed to even comment on some of these, but. Uvalde shooting, which one was that again? I don’t know. One of them probably. This was the one where the police didn’t act in time. And some of the conspiracy theories are that they didn’t act for a while on purpose. Where was it located? I assume Uvalde. Where’s that? I don’t know. Uvaldeh Vivaldi. That’s not the guy that conspiracy buffs. I double. Let me ask you that again. I actually want to know where Valdez is. I can say it.

Okay. All right. Okay. One to ten on, I don’t know, let’s say, like, uvalde. What’s that? Texas. Uvalde, Texas was where there was a school shooting and the cops didn’t respond in time, and they were telling the parents not to come. And it almost seemed like they were more willing to arrest parents and get aggressive with parents than they were with the actual shooter. But I just want to know, on a scale from one to ten, was that a false flag? I don’t know if it would be considered a false flag, but it was some sort of drill operation.

What about just school shootings in general? If you had a. If you had to just give a general rating on one to 1010, meaning that they’re basically all planned in order to take guns away, and one meaning that, no, they’re absolutely organic and they happen exactly as the news media reports it, I would say that’s a solid six. So if you hear something on conventional news, do you automatically distrust what you’re hearing and assume that that is false, or do you think that sometimes they do report news? Well, I do have. I do have my skepticism with corporate media due to our friends over in the media complex of years ago, coming into newsrooms, instituting operation Mockingbird.

Closing that down, of course, now it’s under some new name that I can’t talk about. So I do have difficulty with some narratives, only because I know the people who are supplying them, whether or not I agree or disagree with them. It’s just like, eh, it’s entertainment. It’s entertaining, if you will. I mean, what kind of news is actually impactful to you? What kind of things happening in the world do you care about? Well, I care about connecting with my audience through celebrities, usually. And of course, unfortunately, with a memorial segment, seems that more and more celebrities are passing away.

And usually at the 11:00 hour of the radio show, you’ll find me reading about whoever happened to die that week. I believe we all connect to these artists, musicians, actors. And so I would say that one last connection, that one last farewell, that one last light on the stage, if I can give them that, then that’s my duty. Now, I actually think that you do an amazing job when you read these obits and you kind of make these personal connections. And I almost want to hear what your version would be for me. But I am far too fearful of my own mortality to put either of us through that.

But I do know that Joe Biden is. He just got Covid. I believe he just announced that tonight and that it sounds like they’re starting to weasel him out of the nomination. So if nothing else, his political career might be coming to an end here. So I would love to hear the a Sam newsman obit, but let’s just say for Joe Biden in general, and we can re air this and, I don’t know, eight months when he actually kicks the bucket. No, there once was a man from Delaware, and that man was old Uncle Joe. Old Uncle Joe had hairy legs, and the kids used to get out of the pool and rub his leg hairs and watch the leg hairs go up and down again, like smelling children and showers with the thing.

Oh, yes. Uh, daughter showers. Good. Yes. And I will say, biden malarkey, that was beautiful. And we. We miss you, Joe. We miss you down here. Or up. Sorry. We miss you up here, Joe. I know he was Catholic, so he should be going to heaven, but let’s. We’ll cover both of our bait. I’ll edit in the one that seems most appropriate at the time. Right. Oh, poor Uncle Joe. Oh, Uncle Joe. God love him. Well, I always like ending this on a high note, so that seems about as high as the notes we’re going to hit.

Here, tell people one more time. Well, actually, let’s start out. Throw us another infomercial. How do we get Sam newsman to beat the man? Well, it’s very simple. All you have to do is text 190190. To what? Well, 2804-375-5011 imagine for a moment that you have the power of Saturday morning right at your fingertips. While the government may have taken away Saturday morning, just remember I started this radio show six years ago so that we could bring back the magic and nostalgia of Saturday morning. And as we knock on the gates of corporate media Mordor, we are about to break through and toss the ring of power into the volcano.

And you do that by texting 190190 to 804-375-5011 and you will be making a statement that Saturday mornings matter and that imagination lives on. Damn straight it does. And I think that this is our best chance to getting back and reclaiming that Mkultra programming that at least I hold so dear. I feel that the future generations are missing out by getting that same vintage of Mkultra programming. It’s. It was something else. I’ll tell you what, the eighties were magical, the nineties were magical, and the government decided to take it all away. Who would have thought? We, we flew too close to the sun, my friend.

Flew way too close and then went back around the moon. If it’s even one to ten, the, the moon landings were real. Five. All right, go ahead and tell people where they can find you on social media and everywhere else. That’s not just the, the competition, which we’re going to be absolutely hammering the humans out of existence in the competition has spent over $1,000 trying to defeat little old me. I say thousand, just a thousands. That’s right, thousands of dollars. Corporate media spending several thousands. Listen. Their revenue streams are endless. Their revenue streams are endless. They have bukus of money.

You know how big media is coming after the little guy, coming after the most trusted puppet in media. It’s a shame. It’s a sham. But you know what? At Sam Newsman is where you’re going to find me on social media. At Sam newsman. And you can find me on WDC E 90.1 FM every Saturday morning from 09:00 a.m. to noon. Make sure you download the live 365 app search WDCE. You can listen to the show live or go to wdce.org to listen to the only award winning radio show dedicated to the magic and nostalgia of Saturday morning.

Hosted by me, a real media puppet from the most trusted puppet in media reporting since raw as well. I’m Sam Newsman. Ready for a cosmic conspiracy about Stanley Kubrick, Moon landings, and the CIA? Go visit nasacomic.com come CIA’s made us come. Stanley Kubrick put us on this while we’re singing this song up. Nasacomic.com go visit nasacomic.com go visit NASA comic.com yeah, go visit nasacomic.com nasacomic.com CIA’s biggest con, Stanley Kubrick put us on. That’s why we’re singing this song about nasacomic.com go visit nasacomic.com go Visit NASA nasacomic.com yeah, go visit nasacomic.com never a straight answer is a 40 page comic about Stanley Kubrick directing the Apollo space missions.

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How they playing it? Well without lakers evading. Whatever the course they are to shapeshift. Snakes get decapitated. Meta’s the apex executioner. Flame you out. Nuclear bomb distributed at war. Rather gruesome for eyes to see maxim out. Then I light my trees, blow it off in the face. You’re despising me for what, though? Calculated it rather cutthroat. Paranoid American must be all the blood smoke for real. Lord, give me your day, your way vacate. They wait around that hate. Whatever they say, man is not in the least bit. We get heavy rope take when a beat hits a thing.

Because you well, fuck the niggas for real. You’re welcome. They never had a deal? You’re welcome, man. They lacking appeal? You’re welcome. Yet they doing it still. You’re welcome.
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